Film Festival Nerves

So considering I was the director on a couple different films last semester, I definitely want to get my name out there. So now it's a matter of sending my film off to festival. All I can say is this-I'M NERVOUS! I worked so hard on these films, I love them. So I'm nervous about getting rejected from a film festival. Now, I know, I know... I need to have a thick skin if I'm in the art world, but I'm still nervous. I know there always going to be people who will hate my films. All I want to do is affect one person if I can with my film. If one person likes, I'll be happy.

My self portrait will not be going to festival. I don't feel that a festival is the right place for that film. I think people will not understand the film as I would want them to. So I've decided to do something a little more meaningful with it. I'm showing it to my eye doctors. Both of my eye doctors have been with me for as long as I can remember. They know me extremely well, and they know I have struggled with my eyesight for years. I want to see if they can help me set up a group of parents and children that I can talk to about my story, and maybe I can affect them in some way. I think if I can make a difference in someone's life with this film that would probably be the most amazing thing I could ask for. I've already talked to one of my doctors about the idea and he really was interested in it. I'm hoping to really make this work because I really think that it would benefit me as a person.

Now as for the music video I directed. That I have already started the process of submitting it to festival. I've only submitted to a small one that my school is putting on. I'm planning on submitting it to a few more. I'm really excited to see where that one goes. Now this one I don't think will effect as many people, but maybe one or two will think it's a cool film. I'll be so excited if someone thinks it's awesome. I worked really hard to pull that together, as you know from my previous posts about it, so I really want to see that go SOMEWHERE.


So as for this semester so far I've been put in a group to make a small documentary. I love documentaries so I think this is going to be fun. This class will get me prepared for the big documentary I plan on directing in the fall. Unfortunately I'm not the director on the small one, but I definitely plan on directing a much larger production in the fall. I'm already planning things now considering I already have an okay from the place I want to focus on.

Overall I feel like I'm actually starting to go somewhere. I feel like I'm doing something worthwhile. This is probably one of the best feelings in the world

A Story Of Shoes

So even though I've been insanely stressed out with projects this semester I decided that I really wanted to direct the music video for my experimental film class. I quickly learned that this was probably not the smartest decision in the world, but I knew that I am really good at envisioning things when I listen to music. So I figured it wouldn't be that hard to direct it--boy was I wrong.

So first off my teacher required us to get an actual signed permission form. Well I thought maybe she would be lenient on this and allow getting permission over the internet. So I asked the artist I wanted to use over twitter and she was fine with me using the song. Unfortunately that wasn't good enough for my teacher. So I went back and tried to contact the artist over facebook to see if she could fax me a signed paper. She never replied to me.

So then I went to her producer. He then told me that I had to get permission from the label. So I looked up the label and e-mailed them. I actually ended up trying 2 different people's e-mails in an attempt to get this released. I had no luck with either. At this point I was getting really frustrated. I really wanted to use that specific song because I had a vision for it and it really was a meaningful song for me.

So in my haste to find a song in the 2 days before filming I ended up e-mailing maybe around 10 different bands in an attempt to find one that would sign the song to me. Only one band messaged me back and they were unable to actually get me a signed paper. So then I was pretty much freaking out. 1 day before shooting and I still didn't have a plan.

At that point I did the last option I had. I looked at the website one of my classmates had given us for bands who would be wiling to sign permission. I had a hard time finding a song that I actually could see a vision for. Finally I found one. Immediately the first time I heard it all I could picture in my head was a shot of a closeup of someone walking in converse. I have no idea why that popped into my head, but I just went with it.

So my group and I have been filming different shots of shoes. It's been rather interesting I think. It's almost like we're telling the story of shoes. The piece is going to be mostly closeup shots on shoes and a couple of pretty nature shots thrown in there. I think it will work out really well. After all my hard work I really hope that it will turn out nice. I feel like it will turn out really cool and very experimental.

Love Me Tonight: Silly Mimi

In Love Me Tonight the song “Mimi,” has a very playful and silly role within the movie. The song is very lighthearted and funny. While the song doesn’t have much meaning in itself, it really shows Maurice’s playful personality. It also introduces the story line of Maurice’s love for Jeanette.
The song is a verse-chorus song and the chorus follows an AABA pattern. The lyrics also follow that same pattern, but change the words slightly. There is only one verse shown in the movie and the chorus is sung through twice. The first time through he sings it, the second time through he speaks his way through the chorus.
When Maurice first meets Jeanette he decides that he will sing for her. When he first says “Mimi,” Jeanette seems to be thrown off because that is not her name. She obviously thinks that Maurice is extremely odd, she calls him “insane,” and “mad.” Also the fact that he has fallen in love with her in only a matter of minutes and feels the urge to sing for her seems to make her feel slightly uncomfortable with him. When he first begins to sing she seems to think the song is funny, she smiles and laughs. As he continues the song she seems to get more and more offended by it. After Maurice finishes the song Jeanette becomes so uneasy that she decides to hurry back to her home. The song gives the introduction of Maurice and Jeanette a very humorous feel to it, as well as gives us a conflict between Maurice and Jeanette.
The song seems to be both an expression of how Maurice feels, and a performance. Maurice clearly states that he wants to sing to her. This indicates that the song is a performance, but it also seems like he’s trying to express himself to her. So though this song may be an expressive song as to how Maurice feels, the song is still his performance to Jeanette.
Cinematically not much happens with the camera movements. There are only 3 different camera views that we see in the song. We see closeup shots of both Maurice and Jeanette, and we also get a medium shot of them both. This makes us focus on their facial expressions, especially her reaction to his song.
The song is then reprised by many of the people in the home. They all seem to know the song, which seems odd because Maurice only sang it for Jeanette. They also seem to be laughing and making fun of the song. Since the song is very silly, this type of reprise fits very well.
This song is very different from the other songs in the film because it doesn’t seem to fit as well with the story line as the others do. The song seems to clue us in to a little more of Maurice’s personality. It makes us understand that Maurice is very cheery and humorous. Though the lyrics are hard to understand, the silliness of the song is very clear. Maurice’s personality shines through in this song and adds his humor to it.

Short Film: Meshes Of The Afternoon by Maya Deren

Maya Deren - Meshes of the afternoon (1943)

The first time I watched this film I wasn't sure if I really liked it or not. I watched it again the other day in my History of Avant-Garde class, and I loved it. I think the first time I was bothered by all the jump cuts and I was very confused by it. The second time watching it I think I understood it much better. I also think I understand the feeling of it alot better than I did the first time around.

After learning a little bit about Deren's history I understand a lot better maybe why she made this film. I also noticed little hints along the way that clued me in to her feelings that I didn't notice the first time.

Apparently Deren was remarried several times and I do believe that this film depicts her unhappiness with her first husband, or at least her unhappiness in general. There are several hints that seem to show her unhappiness throughout the film. Also the film is very similar to Inception. (Maybe Christopher Nolan got his idea from this film?)

One thing I definitely saw as a sign of her unhappiness was the addition of the mirrored face figure. I found this figure to be very creepy throughout the film so it was really unnerving. I also noticed that at one point durring the flim the figure places a flower on the bed. Later on in the film her husband does the same action-in the exact same way. I really think that this shows that Deren was unhappy with her husband.

Another clue that showed her unhappiness was that the entire film was based around 1 event. It was the exact same event, but she was in different areas during the event. It seems like she's trapped within this one event and the only way out is through death. I think this could show how she felt trapped within her marriage.

I think there are many different ways people could view this film. I think it shows her unhappiness within her marriage. Unfortunately there is no way to know what the film means to her, but I think it's open for the audience to interpret.

Short Film: Try by Jonas Akerlund

This is a short film I watched quite a while ago. Every time I go back and watch it I always end up crying-which can be hard for a regular film to do let alone a short film. I love the way it begins with only the woman talking and telling a story. I also feel that the story of the doll house has a lot to do with the rest of the film after. I have to say I think what makes the film so strong is the fact that we get the voiceover of Linda who tells you exactly what she is thinking. This gives us a certain connection with the character that we would not normally have. Also the fact that Linda has a very odd train of thought gives her more of a personality than if she were to be speaking in cliches. I think I also love that her voice is slightly higher and pitch and almost sounds child like. It makes me see her as more of an innocent being, though clearly she is not. I also love the fact that we can see into almost every aspect of their lives. We even catch a glimpse of Max peeing on a wall.

Linda tells us of her dreams, but on screen we see a couple who is homeless and unclean. Her dreams seem so innocent, but the visuals of them are not. She speaks of how she will have a home, and lots of food as we see the couple go into the store and Max steals some food. Linda seems almost like she has been forced into that lifestyle. Her dreams of where she wants to be seems to contradict very heavily with the actions she portrays. Her dreams are innocent, yet she resorts to stealing and selling herself for money. At one point in time she says that she knows they "have a future, they know where they are going." This statement seems very contradictory to what we see on screen which seems to be a couple who isn't trying very hard to go anywhere.

As we see Linda with all her dreams of having a great home and a great family, we see that she doesn't seem to care for her well being or her child's. We see her smoking, and drinking which clearly shows her little regard for the health of her baby. She keeps dreaming that all these good things will happen to her, but she doesn't seem to be doing anything to make them better. She's not caring for her baby or herself which is not going to make her life better in the least. She also continues to prostitute herself even when she's pregnant.

Then we find out that she enjoys getting high. The film is already hard enough to watch because we see this girl destroying her life and her baby's, but then we find out that she does meth. This is when the film gets to the point where it's almost unbearable to watch. The visuals of them shooting the needles are so horrifying and graphic I cringe as I watch it. She explains how happy the high makes her, but the visual of her doesn't appear happy at all.

When she gets high we see images of happy families. This is where the film gets a little strange and difficult to understand. I took it as she's imagining all these families who appear happy, but have horrific problems underneath all the apparent happiness. This scene is very graphic and horrifying, but it shows her ideas of how these people are all fake.

After these scenes we see a shot of her on the floor. We see blood all over her pants. Immediately this triggered a reaction of panic from me. I realized this meant that the baby was dying. When she wakes up she tries to get help. Max continues to lay passed out on the bathroom floor. At this point I am angry that he didn't wake up in time to help her. I'm also angry that he allowed her to continue drinking and doing drugs when he knew that it would be bad for the both of them. I figure if he loved her so much wouldn't he want what's best for her. Wouldn't he not want to see her lying dead on the floor?

When max walks into the empty room and lays his head on the bed I can't contain myself anymore. At this point I'm an emotional wreck and the film isn't even over yet. We watch as Linda's casket goes into the furnace. We continue to hear her voiceover as she explains that she has finally found the place she wants to be.

This short film shows an extremely realistic situation, but puts a spin on it by letting us get into the head of one of the characters. It shows a story from a point of view of a character that is not normally portrayed in this way. With the amazing way that this story is told and the graphic visuals this film leaves us feeling very emotional. This film left me feeling something that normally I do not feel. Though I am angry at her for all the drinking and drug use while she's pregnant, I still feel sorry for her when she has passed.

Flickr Films

Shorts that I have done in Flickr over the past 3 years. (yes they are quite silly)









These four were all done as a film race. Basically we had a prop (the weird pointy thing) and we took about a minute of a film and then rewound the tape ten seconds. Then we passed it on to the next group. It turned out to be really fun and quite hilarious. I had pink in my hair at that point. Freshman year of college.



This one we ha 30 minutes to create a 3 minute film. Came out hilarious, but I messed up a lot hahahaha. I love this one. WE also had another prop which was the giant purple clothes pin.



This one is the best of all of them. I was key grip for this one. I had so much fun being on set.

Working On Experimental Film Project 1

So today I did a group shooting for my experimental class. I had so many great ideas for our project, and a lot of them were actually used. Our first project consists of first recording many different sounds. I figured that since I have a horse we could get some really great sounds over where he is. We did end up getting many different sounds at the barn which was really great. We got sounds of the horses neighing, and of random things around the tack room. We found lots of different unique sounds. My group got a long really great so it worked out really well. I think our soundscape will turn out really cool. I'm very excited for this project.